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Zeram (1991)

Zeiramu
Zeiram


Cast:

Yûko Moriyama is Iria
Kunihiro Ida is Teppei
Yukijiro Hotaru is Kamiya
Masakazu Handa is Bob (voice)
Mizuho Yoshida is Zeiramu


What the box says:

What's Zeram? zeram is a giant renegade space alien who is lured to Earth for capture by beigns from the planet Mays. What do you need to catch Zeram? The standard issue warp machine, space bazooka, electric shield, and a computer named Bob.

A breakthrough in futuristic space adventure, ZERAM is fresh and intensely visual sci-fi about a single night's battle between a female bounty hutner and a monstrous space alien. Fueled by action, drama, and comedy, ZERAM is a movie that rockets you into the next dimension!


Plot:

Zeram manages to escape the cops. An ABP is placed on him.

My hat is wind resistant...
My hat is wind resistant...

Kameoh tries returning an apple to a mysterious girl, Iria. Later, Tepe and Kameoh head off to work.

Iria returns to a warehouse filled with computer equipment, weapons, etc. They expect Zeram to arrive on Earth soon. Bob, her computer partner, wants Iria to use the zone to imprison Zeram.

The world is depending on a young Japanese woman who isn't a schoolgirl
The world is depending on a young Japanese woman who isn't a schoolgirl

Tepe and Kameoh are to cut the power from an illegal hookup, Iria’s place. She hides while they explore the place. Tepe steps on a strange platform and disappears. Iria leaves her hiding place.

Zeram crashes into the city.

Iria and Kameoh are beamed away. She imprisons him in a giant crystal. The city blacks out. Iria destroys Zeram’s capsule.

Tepe runs smack dab into Zeram who sends a Zeram-spawn-clone after him.

Iria finds the creepy space alien and lures him to a trap which ensnares him.

Tepe finds the encrystalized Kameoh.

Zeram’s prehensile creepy small masked face frees him.

Aren't I creepy enough? Wait until you see the tentacle.
Aren't I creepy enough? Wait until you see the tentacle.
A firefight ensues where Iria loses the zone control. She breaks down to using her power suit. Let the kung fuin’ ensue. She manages to entrap him again but contend with another Zeram-spawn. He gets out again, and Iria manages to encrystalize Zeram.

Tepe wants some answers. Iria explains only they are in a different continuum. A Zeram-spawn is beamed away with Iria back to the real world. Tepe, Kameoh, and the trapped Zeram are left behind about to beamed back.

Tepe examines Iria’s stuff when a Zeram-clone attacks. Shooting at it, Tepe damages the crystal imprisoning Zeram who escapes and wanders away.

In the real world, Iria learns the Z-spawn has damaged the transporter. Bob is more worried about losing their license if the civilians died. She tries calling them and wants them to fight Zeram.

The guys run over Zeram when the prehensile head thing bites Kameoh in the arm.

Bob reveals that Zeram consumes biological material to evolve or create clones. The weak spot must be the Head (a 1000 pardons to Al Snow…)

Zeram creates another clone and kills it for being weak.

Iria contacts them about how the zone is shrinking and must destroy Zeram. The guys hide from the monster. But get separated. Tepe calls Iria.

Iria wants to use the Medea Cannon and has it sent into the zone. Tepe searches for the cannon.

Zeram shoots at Tepe when Kameoh comes to the rescue in a scoop lift. Suddenly, Iria swings in to handle things. Opens fire and blasts a hole through Zeram who reforms.

Iria sends Tepe and Kameoh to get the weapon she sent. A skeletal Zeram is in pursuit. Iria manages to lure him away with more Kung Fuin’.

Tepe and Kameoh find the Medea Cannon. Zeram heads for them while Iria manages to assemble it. Zeram gets exploded quite thoroughly this time.

Zeram’s head has been encrystalized by Iria.

Tepe and Kameoh are beamed back to the real world and Zeram’s head is. It starts flying around the room and damages the transporter again. Zeram begins his gooey reformation.

Iria is trapped in the Zone.

Kameoh and Tepe have to contend with a weakened Zeram.

The zone is shrinking. Bob has Kameoh fix the transporter cable.

Zeram cuts the transporter cable and grabs Tepe. Kameoh reconnects the cable.

Iria beams finally caps Zeram’s creepy prehensile mask thing which dies.

Kameoh and Tepe are bruised and battered. Iria cuts off a braid and gives it to them as a token of respect. Bob takes a picture of them for their files.


What I say:

The battle is to have at least one movie that starts with the letter "Z." The letter "X" is harder if you can't find any of the X-tro movies. However, then, you realize anyone can review Zardoz, like I've already done. So, you keep looking for something besides the Ziegfield Follies and pray that Zontar will be on late one night. Until then, you settle for reaching as far down the alphabetical chain with Zeram.

We get a couple of random guys pop up for no-real reason other than since any movie set on Earth needs some average-Joe types to balance out the killer alien and bounty hunter chick. I'm sure having some guys that need to be explained what is going on with a killer alien is just gravy.

I've seen the anime version and plan on reviewing it one day. A live action sequel to an anime OAV: Iria: Zeram Animation is an awfully strange idea. People have heard rumors of a live-action Akira or years back about Winona Rider as Mai the Psychic Girl which may be an idea even stranger than Gingerdead Man with the voice of Gary Busey as the psychotic pastry. But onto today's review.

For the most part, Yûko Moriyama does look similar to Iria except for her hair color. The blue powersuit costume is about as close from real world to the anime version. We're not going to have the anime figure. You can't have an animated suit to match directly to real life. Let's have an example. The X-Men comic book or the 1990s Fox cartoon had Psylocke in her ninja swimsuit look. However, in X-3: the Last Stand she wasn't in black leather-spandex swimsuit ninja costume.

Animation can have many special effects that live action would lack (before the advent of today's CGI). Guns could have enormous energy plasma recoils. In anime, Zeram is an Alien in almost a Geigeresque fashion without the parasitic life cycle. Live action, Zeram, is just a ominous being that doesn't say or do anything but wear a really funny giant hat.

The discussion of anime physics or anime genetics can't be avoided. How exactly is a perky Japanese girl to be a fearsome bounty hunter? That my ninjapprentices is a great mystery. I'm sure that super powers are somehow passed through the however bright your hair color is. The more normal hair color the less agile and able to wield a energy sword. Well, obviously, we're not considering if said person has a strong connection to the force or is a mutant.



3 NINJAS

Quotable Dialogue

"All you have to do is now choose the zone."
"You don't have tp be so rough now."
"As I live and breathe, Zeram, what a pleasure to meet."
"2 things I hate are loud women and cockroaches."
"He's as funny as a sneeze."
"Eating a cockroach will bring that on."


Morals of the Story

Gus wearing creepy femine masks must be left alone.
Tasers can imprison you in giant crystals.
Pay phones are bright neon green.
Masked men know all about electricity.
10 foot apart is a major distance to shoot across.
Electric company employees wear pastel colored uniforms.
Killer alien sound like laughing babies.
Women eat giant white cockroaches.
Motorscooters make youa badazzz..


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