Terminal Invasion (2002)

Cast:

Bruce "...GROOVY..." Campbell is Jack
Chase "I can only go so far being on ST:DS9" Masterson is Cathy Garrett
C. David Johnson is David Higgins
Kedar Brown is Darian
Andrew Tarbet is Andrew Philips

What the IMDB says:

Aliens in human disguise commandeer a rural airport during a snowstorm. To survive, the people trapped inside must determine which of their own is not of this Earth.

Plot:

2001: a Space Odyssey trippy credits usher us into the movie. During a snowstorm, while 2 cops are taking Jack (ok BRUCE CAMPBELL) to prison, they crash their jeep and discover the radio is out.

At the local airport, several passengers want to take off and try to bully the uber-hot pilot Kathy. The cops walk in with the manacled BRUCE.

The deadite smacker needs the lizard drained. In the men’s room, an elderly priest brutally beats the cops. One of them is able to shoot the priest. Bruce gets free of the handcuffs. Grabbing the gun, he shoots the priest until he melts into a pile of goo.

The airport security guard gets the drop on Bruce who still gets loose. He holds everyone hostage. BRUCE only wants to go where the women say “aboot,” Canadia…The security guard who makes Barney Fife look like Dirty Harry struggles with Bruce again. The resulting struggle ends with a woman being shot in the stomach.

As everyone stands in shock, the dead woman grabs the military guy. BRUCE is able to cap her, and everyone sees the body melt. BRUCE gets knocked out again.

The passengers want to fly out. Suddenly, they claim the dead woman disappeared, not melted. The uppity business man, David, grabs the gun and demands to be flown out. As the sergeant tries to calm David, he accidentally shoots him. BRUCE has to escape being tied up again. Grabbing the gun, BRUCE is in charge once more…

Kathy wants BRUCE’s word not to hurt anyone. They come up with the idea to use the X-Ray machine to scan everyone. The first guy goes through with no problems. However, when the little old lady goes through she pulls in the security guard and numerous shots destroy the machine.

Kathy is searching for the devil children who are running around like little monsters and discovers an old working radio.

BRUCE while getting clothes for his trip to Canadia learns that the kids don’t belong to the arguing couple. He rushes out to find Kathy. Trying to explain her to get away from the kids, she learns when one of the John Carpenter’s Things-out into a killer alien. BRUCE and Kathy are able to get away.

Darien, David, and the arguing couple are in the snack room. The kids ask to be let in. However, showing the most intelligence in any “who do we trust alien” movie ever, they refuse to let the kids in and realize they better barricade the door after hearing the freaky kids threats.

BRUCE and Kathy find an old plane and try to get it running.

Searching for the weapons, the rest discover an avalanche starter looks like a rocket launcher. The kids break through the door and kill the husband (aren’t you glad I didn’t give him a name?) David and Darien fire the avalanche starter which blows up 1 alien. The recoil knocks Darien against the far wall. David checks his vitals and realizes he’s dead. It is just David and Sarah, the 2 minute widow left.

Kathy wants to go back for the rest. They use the crawlspace to get David and Sarah. The alien shakey chase cam ensues. David is grabbed and must pay for shooting the sergeant.

Reaching the hangar, they check the security camera and realize that Darien is still alive. They plan to go after him. Kathy and Bruce head back. Sarah is watching the video camera to report where the alien is. BRUCE gets Darien. They’re being chased by the alien. Pouring down fuel, BRUCE is able to trap the alien in a small room and promptly BBQ it.

BRUCE just wants Kathy to fly him to Canada. The phone rings. Darien answers it and sounds exactly like Sarah. Darien is an alien, too?

Grabbing the gun, Darien explains how his people will enslave humanity. Placing a bracelet on Sarah, he’s able to completely control her. She says how BRUCE killed everyone. Darien will let BRUCE go. Heading out, BRUCE realizes Darien has the gun he gave to Kathy earlier, and it is unloaded.

Darien versus BRUCE. The big concept of this fight is throwing stuff at the alien. Chaining Darien up in the winch they are able to push him to the airplane’s propellers.

Kathy patches BRUCE up. Hearing the approaching sirens, she flies him to Canada. In the air, he asks her out on a date. Smooth, Ash, real smooth…

What I say:

It's time for another roundtable? Another roundtable, this time tackling the cinematic experiences of Sci-Fi Channel made-for-TV movies. While, making jokes about giant killer animals may be tired and worn. Those seem to be about 95% of their original movies. In that other 5%, we get some things besides killer animals, normally killer aliens...Though digging through my pile of VHS tapes, I rediscovered Terminal Invasion. It hadn't been uncovered in years...So delving into a Sci-Fi Channel original movie from years back left me with one thought: this is the exactly same kind of movie they showed last weekend. Everyone else is thinking the same thing, that the title sounds like a Michael Crichton medical thriller novel.

Bruce Campbell, the man, the myth, the chin...I don't think I have to tell the movies the man has starred in. Though, just if you want some truly ninjaliscious reviews: Bubba Ho-Tep, Evil Dead 2, and Maniac Cop. For if anyone doesn't know who Bruce is, obviously, they're not even a fifth class Mississippi imbibing ninjapprentice...If you're wanting Ash, Brisco County Jr, or Bruce Campbell from the Old Spice commercials, you're going to be severely disappointed. Bruce's Jack is definitely a tough guy but doesn't have the typical Campbellian swagger like in Army of Darkness or even in his cameos in the Spiderman movies.

I watched this movie when it was first aired and had pretty much forgotten it since then... To forget a Bruce Campbell movie, that's normally not a good sign. Unfortunately, I wasn't that impressed with it. This time it seemed to go better. For a Sci-Fi original, it doesn't have the typical hour of start up time before getting to the action parts.

The director is Sean S. Cunningham. A name that many horror fans would recognize more from his work as the director or producer of Deepstar 6, House, House 2 Last House on the Left, and Friday the 13th and several of its sequels. If you really care to see his resume, there's always the IMDB. I get the feeling that the People Under the Stairs 2 isn't going to need a big promotional push when it's released.

Terminal Invasion does the "Ten Little Indians" story. Watch this movie and try not to think of John Carpener's: Thing . Small group confined by a snowstorm are slowly killed by an alien monster. Funny to think that with Cunningham, you'd expect the movie to be gorier. Gorewise, you're not going to find anything close to Rob Bottin's special effects work.

What may be the hardest thing to believe is that these people after seeing a corpse melt away in 10 seconds don't seem bothered by that fact at all. Right after a body disappears, they make up these insane excuses. Body vanishes with no trace in front of you, you're not going to think something strange is happening. There has to be some sort of equation that relates intelligence as inversely proportional factor tied to the presence of typical horror characters.

Quotable Dialogue
"OK, convict, we're going on a little nature hike."
"You gotta watch or hold?"
"I am the alpha female, people..."
"Meaning you can gun down more than one person a day..."
"Where would be the fun in that?"
"Funny for a white guy..."
Morals of the Story
Police know the clinical definition of blizzard.
Charter planes have first class seats.
X-Ray machines can detect metal.
Killer aliens reunite estrantged married couples.
Screaming is a plan...