Shaolin Deadly Kicks (1977)

Flash Legs
Deadly Kick

Cast:

Tao-liang Tan is Hsiao Hung-yi
Lieh Lo is Lo Shung
Hop Wang
Lung Fei

What the box says:

Three years ago, a band of thieves known as the Eight Dragons stole a treasure map and divided it into eight pieces amongst themselves before going their separate ways. Now the time has come for the Eight Dragons to reunite and steal the treasure. But it won't be quite that easy.

Two of the thieves are dead, killed by constable Hsiao Hung-yi (Tan Tao-liang), after they murdered his partner. Now the constable has their pieces of the map and sets out to recover the remaining six. Long Shung (Lo Lieh), leader of the Eight Dragons, isn't about to let this happen.

Plot:

The 8 Dragon gang breaks into a temple. Most of the gang decides slaughtering the monks is hunky dory on the way to steal the map for a hidden treasure. The boss wasn't happy with the gang going ballistic. He divides the map into pieces for everyone in the gang and decides it would be best to hide for 3 years before going for the treasure.

1 party guy is trying to live the party life without the paying. Getting into a fight, he gets tossed in jail. A couple of his jail mates talk him into breaking out. After the breakout, they start digging for the treasure. Hsiao Hung-yi wants the other piece of map from party guy. A fight breaks out let the Kung Fu and shovel fu breakout. Hsiao Hung-yi's partner, Chang Olei, is mortally wounded.

Don't pull the shovel out of that vampire! Hsiao Hung-yi gets the map piece. He is a policeman after the 8 Dragons.

Hsiao Hung-yi is looking for more of the 8 Dragons. He finds the next guy on his list, Chan Fan. He offers to let him go and give him money for a doctor for Chan Fan's sick son. Chan agrees at first but changes his mind. Breaking into a fight, Hsiao Hung-yi kills him. Hsiao Hung-yi tells Chan Fan's blind mother her son had to leave on a trip and gives her money for the sick boy.

Jade is being carried around through the forest when goons attack her and her bearers. She does a decent attempt at Kung Fuing them but Hsiao Hung-yi walks into the fight and Kung Fu mightily the goons before walking off.

Another Dragon guy is informed that 3 of the gang have been killed. He plans to try to trap whoever is killing the gang by luring him into a trap. Weasely guy spreads rumors around the village which eventually gets to the Hsiao Hung-yi. Weasely guy offers to tell Hsiao Hung-yi where the next gang guy is. However, a squad attacks Hsiao Hung-yi using smoke bombs and spears. They're able to retrieve the 3 map pieces. However, Hsiao Hung-yi gets up afterwards.

Dragon guy meets an art dealer with 3 map pieces. Removing his disguise, the art dealer is Hsiao Hung-yi who starts to Kung Fu mightily against Dragon guy and his goons. Being the hero allows him to dispatch the villains. Running into the guy's right hand man, Hsiao Hung-yi Kung Fu mightily and has 5 pieces of the map.

Master Chu, another 8 Dragon, is told about Hsiao Hung-yi by the right hand man. Chu has to deal with his midget son getting engaged.

Who ate the liver flavored ice cream? Hsiao Hung-yi is skulking around Chu's mansion to find the next piece when Chu finds him. Hsiao Hung-yi versus more goons will allow the Kung Fu mightilying to ensue. However, Hsiao Hung-yi gets caught but is able to escape which allows for more kung fu fighting.

Midget is leering at his future wife. Hsiao Hung-yi is able to escape again and frees the bride.

Cut to daylight, Hsiao Hung-yi wants Chu's piece so more fighting ensues.

Don't point you finger at anyone like that. It might go off... Chu is able to stab Hsiao Hung-yi in the back before he is mortally wounded. Hsiao Hung-yi hobbles off.

He wakes up being tended by Jade. Apparently, her father was the boss of the 8 Dragons, but he hasn't told her. As Hsiao Hung-yi tries to regain his strength, the 7th Dragon meets with Boss since it is 3 days until the 3 years is over to go after the treasure.

Boss wants Hsiao Hung-yi to leave. Meanwhile, 7th Dragon is skulking about and wants the Boss to kill Hsiao Hung-yi.

Later, Hsiao Hung-yi tells Jade that he's a policeman after the 8 Dragons.

Boss offers to give the map and the other pieces to 7th if leaves Hsiao Hung-yi alone. Boss has discovered pacifism and the moral quandary of robbing and killing. Well, 7th stabs him.

Tiger claw will strike you down...

Jade and Hsiao Hung-yi find her dead father.

7th reaches the site of the treasure when Jade and Hsiao Hung-yi catch up. 7th versus Jade and Hsiao Hung-yi ensues. Kung Fu mightyling ensues. 7th starts tossing around grenades. Hsiao Hung-yi is able to trigger off one of the grenades which blows up 7th. Hsiao Hung-yi and Jade walk off.

What I say:

After a couple of monsters, it's time for another something a bit different. No more monsters or trying to milk the word "gelatinous" into a review for a couple of weeks. Lets face it, SideOrderOfNinjas needs some sweet Kung Fu mightling to ensue. There is a difference between the ninja movies and the 1970s style Kung Fu movies. Granted, most of the ninja movies are just sort of pieced together from different movies and have plenty of brightly colored jumpsuited ninjas. Jackie Chan was doing plenty of the disposable martial arts movies Killer Meteor or the totally insane Fantasy Mission Forcebefore finally starting to hit Drunken Monkey and some of his other big movies. Think of it like all the B-Westerns John Wayne starrred in before Stagecoach.

Not sure why the matrimonial midget (that's the kind of alliteration the world needs more of) was necessary. But, how many times do I get to see badly dubbed movies with midgets not wanting to get married that pitch fits? Shame he doesn't have to contend with Weng Weng from For Your Height Only. Martial arts midget fights, great, great idea...

One of the big problems with reviewing a martial arts movie is not resorting to a blow by blow description of the fights. The characters seem to fight for several minutes stop for 30 seconds to catch their breaths and then back to another fight for example the whole Chu fights. The fact that the hero has to retrieve 6 different pieces of the map. I think he has to defeat 6 enemy bosses in a videogame along with several groups of goons throughout the movie as well.

Getting something lost in translation is understandable in a movie especially when you're not sure of who is who. Can't think of any Kung Fu movies set 200, 300 years ago that have a hero as a constable. Dubbing one guy as the constable who has to defeat the 8 Dragon gang might be more explainable than saying the gang killed hte hero's brother or father in the temple. Typically, the hero is a monk or martial arts student who has sworn to give up fighting but pushed more than he can take so he goes all Shaolin on them.

Shaolin Deadly Kicks isn't the dreaded awful Kung Fu movie. Neither, it is the super jaw-dropping amazing kind in the vein of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. It is more like some of middle of the ground stuff like Rage of the Masters and 36 Shaolin Beads. This is one of the typical movies found on the public domain sets you find anywhere.

Badly Dubbed Quotable Dialogue
"Brother, it's me..."
"Who are you?"
"What is this calling me, you?"
"Don't think I'm a bum."
"I also know you're not a fire wood cutter."
"These shock you?"
"You, you're not dead."
Morals of the Story
Half masks aren't suspicious in temples.
Jail bars are commonly made of wood.
Shovels are martial arts weapons.
Shovels make whooshing noises.
Shovels can be used as spears.
3 card Monte is a Chinese card game.
Wheelbarrows are weapons.
Black powder grenades were common place in early China.