Monster From a Prehistoric Planet (1967)

Daikyojû Gappa
Gappa the Triphibian Monsters
Gappa, the Triphibian Monster
The Giant Beast Gappa
The Triphibian Monster

Cast:

Tamio Kawaji is Hiroshi Kurosaki
Yoko Yamamoto is Itoko Koyanagi
Yuji Okada is Daize Tonooka
Tatsuya Fuji is George Inoue

What the box says:

Seeking exotic wildlife for a Tokyo zoo, a team of exploreres is dispatched to the South Seas. On a small, uncharted island, they discover a hideous bird-lizard monster, newly hatched from a refrigerator-sized egg. Despite warnings from the local natives, the newborn is spirited back to Japan, where it is caged as a major tourist attraction. When the full-grown parents arrive to reclaim the offspring, total destruction and mayhem ensue. Modern weaponry has no effect on the giant monsters, but scientists rally witha bold plan to reunite the creatures and preserve mankind. Features the special effects wizardry of Akira Watanabe, whose groundbreaking work on the original Godzilla series inspired an army of imitators.

Plot:

A ship is on the sea. We have the obvious heroine or at least the sunbathing chick. Below deck, scientists are working by pouring various beakers of colored liquids together.

Strangely, Hugh Hefner isn't in this movie In Japan, the publisher of Playmate Magazine announces that he will soon start developing PLAYMATE LAND without Jenny McCarthy. It will be a theme park with a tropical island theme. Various exotic animals will roam the island. People can go to the tropics without leaving the country. All of the reporters think that is only slightly better news than finding a cure for cancer.

Back on the ship, the Non-comic relief spots a strange glowing blob in the sea. As The tiny ship was tossed…If not for the courage of the fearless crew…By the time, Non-comic relief gets the scientists to check. The glowing blob has vanished. However, they approach the islands to explore for exotic animals.

The natives spy as the explorers land and reach the village. The natives surround and celebrate, think they were promised to return. Tribal dance ensues. The explorers learn of Gappa, the natives’ god. The explorers try to convince the natives to move to PLAYMATE LAND without Carmen Electra. Kurasagi wants to see the giant stone statue.

Non-comic relief wanders off on his own to treasure hunt.

Kurasagi and Chick follow a native boy who continually tries to warn them to keep away from Gappa. Suddenly, an earthquake rocks the island and destroys the statue revealing a hidden cave behind it.

Kurasagi and Chick explore the cave. As the plumb the depths in a non-tentacular way, Non-comic relief discovers the cave. In the cave, a giant underground lake and dinosaur skeleton is found. The biggest surprise is the giant egg which immediately hatches. Another earthquake drives the explorers away. Returning, they discover the broken egg shell.

Back at the village, the naives are fire-dancing. The chief is terrified that Gappa is angry. Kursagi being an enlightened man of science claims that Gappa was the skeleton.

Back in the cave, the lake bubbles as Gappa rises.

The explorers have the baby Gappa in a cage. The first dinosaur to hatch in millions of years will be a huge story. Chick is worried about taking the baby Gappa from the island.

Back in Japan, the publisher learns of the explorers catching a Gappa. He rages that no one will be interested in seeing a BIRD-LIZARD.

The village is destroyed when the volcano erupts, and Adult Gappa tears into it, too. The natives take their canoes to the sea.

The publisher arrives on the ship. He chews out the explorers about only bringing back a BIRD-LIZARD. Well, after, he finally sees the baby Gappa, he is slightly more impressed and plans to bring it into the country.

Newspaper montage ensues. The publisher will raise baby Gappa for PLAYMATE LAND without Erika Eleniak.

The scientists have been studying the baby Gappa and want to keep it out of PLAYMATE LAND without Shannon Tweed. Chick is disgusted with Kursagi who is only interested in baby Gappa as a news story. The scientists also have discovered that the baby Gappa could communicate with its parents should they have been alive. The publisher uses a cattle-prod on baby Gappa to train it.

The native boy is on an American ship. He warns them of Gappa. The captain learns that 2 subs are chasing him. It’s Mommy and Daddy Gappa.

Elsewhere, in an airport traffic control tower, they spot 2 unidentified aircraft.

The scientists hear report of mysterious aircraft and contemplate if those are Gappa’s parents.

A couple of guys spot the adult Gappas rise from the sea. Let the Tokyo residents panic as the Gappas do the Kaiju Hustle. The city model destruction ensues as the military stock footage leaps into action.

The Gappas continue their rampage and get to see their wobbly eyes.

I'm not Godzilla's deformed half brother The military attacks them to no avail. The kaijus fire breath finishes off the tanks. They fly away. Jets and bombers are ineffective, too. Let the pagoda trampling ensue.

The Gappas fly off and dive into a lake.

Let the newspaper montage showing the panicked citizenry ensue.

The powers that be discuss how to handle the monsters. They decide to use sound waves to drive them out of the lake.

Elsewhere, the native boy (Taki but let’s just call him Kenny to save confusion) is brought to the scientists. Kenny tries talking to the baby Gappa.

The sonic attack plan is prepped. Chick talks with one of the scientists. She is fuming that men are driven by ambitions. The scientist is sure she needs a bit of Kurasagi.

Operation Soundblaster is implemented in the lake. The recording of Kiss’s The Elder is able to force the monsters to commit suicide. Sorry, wishful thinking on my part. Kenny is talking in a high pitched Mary Hart-like voice that the Gappas want their baby returned. Chick agrees with him. However, it is too late to stop the plan.

The Gappas are having to contend with Celine Dion. Sorry wishful thinking on my part, again. As the Gappas rise, the military uses their missile launchers which are no more effective than had the GI Joes used them. Kenny does another warning to save the Gappas. Too bad, they didn’t blast his warning as the sound waves which would have driven the monsters away for sure. The missiles just anger the Gappas but don’t hurt them.

As the Gappas fly away, a tidal wave floods the nearby cities. The government plans to defend Tokyo from the approaching Gappas.

Chick tries to convince Kurasagi to free the baby Gappa and that will make the adult Gappas to leave. The PLAYMATE Publisher won’t let the baby Gappa go because, it’s his and fear of legal responsibility. His 6 year old daughter disowns him for being “mean” and wanting to keep a baby from its parents.

The choppers are air-lifting baby Gappa off.

As the adult Gappas trash an oil refinery like a hair metal goes through a hotel room ensues.

Just waiting for the Pepto Bismo filming to start...

Scientists, Chick, Kenny, and everyone wait and watch as the choppers release the baby Gappa. Let the touching reunion between the Gappas ensue with plenty of “ohhhhhhhhhhhhh” music.

Everyone watches as the Gappas embrace their child. Kenny tells them to leave with shades of Gamera’s Kenny.

The baby Gappa starts to fly as its proud parents follow.

Chick apologizes for ruining Kurasagi and the Publisher’s careers. She wants to quit, marry an office slob and be a baby machine. Walking away, the scientists Kurasagi to go after her as the Gappas fly into the sunset.

What I say:

Back to Tokyo for more, model mangling monster madness. Always avoid alliteration. You don't got ot kaiju movies for deep characterization and probing the complexities of moral ambiguities. I speak for myself wanting to see a monster break stuff. Just admit it, you'll fell better.. It warms the deep recesses where my heart would be just to see sweet model destruction without any computer graphics. Just a model being leveled by a guy in a monster suit is better than athousand digital fires and meteor impacts.

While most Kaiju movies seem to break down into either the Godzillaverse like Mothra, etc...King Kong Versus Godzilla, Godzilla Vs Mothra, Godzilla's Revenge, and Terror of MechaGodzilla. Or everyone's favorite friend of children giant flying turtle, Gamera, Gamera the Invincible, Attack of the Monsters, and Gamera Versus Monster X. Well, Japan has more than just the famous giant monsters ready to pounce on those cities. Movies like Gorgo indeed were more determined to be ripoffs to cash in on the success of better kaiju movies.

Dubbing in a kaiju movies is pretty much expected to be completely ridiculous and insane. Japanese dockworkers that sound like they're from Brooklyn seems a bit hard to accept. Though that is part of the charm for me. I'm sure the typical "DUBS are evil, philistine" flame mails aren't that far away. I may be safe as long as I don't try to mention dubs and anime.

A group of explorers search for strange animals and discover a giant monster on an island. It does a have a bit of King Kong vibe to it. They were hired to find animals for a theme park...The remake of King Kong that has Kong tied to a giant gas pump in the remake from the 70s seems even like it stole the theme park from this forgotten kaiju movie. Somehow, I doubt the animal angle was really considered. They just wanted a reason or the mosnters to attack Tokyo.

One of the big debates in B-Movies is are Japanese kids in kaiju movies more annoying than the creepy Italian kid in horror movies. Many fights have broken out over such a conumdrum though maybe less that immortal "tastes great, less filling" debate but still close. The island native boy is just slightly less annoying than Kenny from Gamera the Invincible or the kid in Attack of the Monsters who wants to find a world where there are no traffic accidents. The native boy was nowhere as annoying as the publisher's 8 year old daughter who wanted to disown her father for him being mean b keeping a baby from its parents...

A movie where man takes an animal from its parents who try to find and rescue their baby. Awwwwwwww, that is so sweet it could cause a diabetic coma. Never mind the fact, that the monsters are ugly. If Gappa hadn't looked like a rubber suited monster, could almost picture the story without the city destruction as the parents trying to rescue their child. It would become one of those heartwarming animal movies showing the cruelty of man. Imagine Free Willy crossed with Orca..The mother attacks all the ships in the area in her whalish vendetta to get the sea park to return her calf...

Well, by the end of the movie you'll be wanting to throttle the baby Gappa like it was Minya in Godzilla's Revenge. Why do baby monsters have to be so irritating? Well not quite as bad as the 4 year old kid kicking the back of your seat in the theater.

What is a triphibian? An amphibian can live on land or in water which could almost make them biphibians. Still the "tri" has to include them being able to fly which would make birds biphibians excepts maybe ducks. That'll confuse any biology majors. Think I'll try to keep the the attempted science thoughts out. I'll let the experts go into the square cube discussion about monsters.

I'm not sure what sort of moral there is when the heroine decides she isn't strong enough for a job and wants to basically be barefoot and pregnant. However, she was right about how the baby Gappa should be returned. Though no one really listens and untold property damage ensued rather than letting the ugly monster go soon.

Quotable Dialogue
"I'd go out of my mind if I had to stay on this boat any longer."
"You're right, and every one of you will be able to enjoy a South Seas trip, without leaving the country... right here. Here. Here! Right here. Ha ha ha ha ha ha."
"THEY'RE CANNIBALS!!!!"
"I never saw a chicken egg that big before."
"It only looks like a monstre but cute."
"You can't judge a man's value by his height."
"Just a BIRD-LIZARD?"
"stay home, marry an office worker, and wash diapers."
Morals of the Story
A tropical theme park is only slightly greater than sliced bread.
All jungle exploreres wear safari shorts and pith helmets.
Bird-lizards are commonplace.
All animals are entitled to electrocution by cattle-prod.
Buildings collaps like they're actually boxes.
All group pictures must be taken during natural disasters.