Keep My Grave Open (1976)

House Where Hell Froze Over

Cast:

Camilla Carr is Lesley Fontaine / Kevin
Gene Ross is Dr. Emerson
Stephen "Ned, the Insurance salesman from Groundhog Day" Tobolowsky is Robert
Ann Stafford is Suzie
Sharon Bunn is Twinkle

What the IMDBsays:

A crazy woman who lives in an old mansion thinks she's with her husband, who lures victims to her.

Plot:

A hitchhiker is dropped off from a truck. He checks out a rural house and starts looting the fridge. After leaving, he is killed by someone.

In the morning, at a butcher shop, Leslie Fontaine gets her groceries and heads home to check on Kevin. The house is the one that the hitchhiker raided the night before. That night, Kevin sneaks out to attack and kill Suzie, the farmhand's girlfriend.

Remember to turn the lights off when you leave the room or that samurai sword will turn you off permanently...

The sheriff talks with Leslie about Kevin, her brother?... She refuses to let him question Kevin and isn't happy with how the sheriff recomends that she return to the hospital for more treatment because of her abusive aunt.

Fighting an evil shark would make more sense than this...

Later, Leslie meets Kevin and then some lovin' to ensue? Gettin' even creeper...

Bobby, the farmhand, stops by after he learns that Leslie isn't going to let him ride her horse in the rodeo. He asks her about her husband, Kevin. She starts putting the moves on him. She kills Bobby with a sword.

The secret ending to That 70's Show... Kevin is a multiple personality of Leslie.

Leslie picks up a "friend", Twinkle, for Kevin. They talk about guys for a few minutes first. Twinkle is about to leave when when "Kevin", Leslie in men clothes chases after her with a samurai sword. Twinkle hides in a car and discovers it is full of dead bodies. "Kevin" stabs her...

Leslie calls the local doctor for "Kevin" who got hurt. She gives the doctor her will before telling the story of when she was a teen about "Kevin" and the aunt.

Doctor recommends that Leslie go to a clinic. However, she has taken a large dosage of pills and OD's.

At the funeral, the doctor and the others leave. Afterwards, a ghostly "Kevin" walks up and heads to the house...

What I say:

With the running time only being 79 minutes long, that does sound about the time of a 1970s TV-movie, or it could just be that seeing Good Against Evil a couple of weeks ago has got me on an even more strange All-Fired-Up-Pat Benentar ranting than normal (must strike down that horrible word normal if usuing it to describe myself). Actually, this isn't any kind of TV-movie.

What do you do to make a movie title sound more like a spaghetti western? Keep My Grave Open sounds like the title of 4th Clint Eastwood's Man With No Name should be gunning down Lee Van Cleef somewhere throughtout it. Yes, there's not a 4th. Well, it almost sounds like something that would be attached into one of the Django movies.

Yes, another one of those DVD sets are still keeping plenty of movies existent. To think before those sets I was starting to think I'd have to check VHS tapes scattered throughout the house.

Well, the 1970s was still trying to do something different. The slasher of the 1980s hadn't arrived yet.... Who needs a kitchen knife when you can chase after all the victims with a large sword? Halloween wasn't what the perpetual sequels and remakes transformed it into, finally.

Keep My Grave Open thankfully doesn't have the gore of Cabin Fever. This plot is starting to sound like something David Cronenberg would tame down to the front half of a Law & Order: SVU episode with less police. Trying to decypher the psychological horror in these kind of movies isn't worth the effort. If a character is talked of being a main character through the entire picture but never seen, they have to either be dead or non-existent. Do yourself a a favor by watching Psycho rather than this movie...

Quotable Dialogue
"Hello, anybody home?"
"You will please leave now."
"I'm doing this for you, Caesar."
"Where will you go?"
"Let's get it on..."
"A nice place to be dead..."
Morals of the Story
Hitchhikers have the right of way to break into houses.
Faking the existent of spouses in small towns is not difficult.
Doctors routinely make house calls.