Side Order of Ninjas

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Heroic Trio


Cast:

Michelle "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" Yeoh is Ching / Jing / Invisible Woman / Number 3
Anita "Rumble in the Bronx" Mui is Deanna / Tung / Shadow Fox
Maggie "Supercop" Cheung is Chat / Thief Catcher / Mercy / Mercenary
Damian Lau is Insp. Lau
Anthony "I'll show you Full Contact" Wong is Kau


What the box says:

Michelle Yeoh (Crouching Tiger,Hidden Dragon; Tomorrow Never Dies), Anita Mui (Jet Li's The Enforcer, Rumble in the Bronx) and Maggie Cheung (Supercop) form an unstoppable combination as three powerful martial arts experts - each with her own secret superhero identity - who band together to battle the ultimate evil! Their foe is a demented but powerful wizard who believes that if he can kidnap all the babies in China he can build a demonic ruling class and eventually dominate the world. With everything on the line, it's up to the Heroic Trio - Shadow Fox, Mercy, and the Invisible Woman - to rise up and stop him!

A big-screen adventure that's like Charlie's Angel meets The Terminator - you're sure to love all the hard-hitting fun in this action-packed martial arts fantasy!


Plot:

In the city over 3 months, 18 babies have been kidnapped. The police want to contact Shadow Fox.


Things dind't look this in Rumble in the Bronx.
They relieved intel that the kidnapper will go after Commander's Lu's son. In the hospital nursery, a couple of babies float off when Shadow Fox saves one from falling but the other is lifted away by Invisible Woman.

The baby is taken to the Wizard. He wants to use one of the babies as the new immortal emperor but the rest will be used as the ruling class.

Martin, the scientist, is working on his new project, the invisibility cloak. His wife (Invisible Woman) is working for the wizard and kidnapping the babies.

Elsewhere, the police are having to handle a hostage negoitation situation. Things don't look good until, Mercy, Mercery rides up to rescue the hostages. She jumps in and saves them. She offers to rescue Lu's son for a proper reward.


The rifle tends to only attract hunters...

Back at the hospital, a hysterical guy locks Mercy and Deanna (disguised Shadow Fox). He is ranting about getting the babies. Deanna is able to call her husband, a cop, who is able to catch the hysterical guy. Mercy runs off with a baby. Shadow Fox chases her They fight until the Invisible Woman joins in the fray. Shadow Fox can't catch them and returns the baby to the hospital but surgery couldn't save him...

Invisible Woman gets new orders from the wizard to take the invisible cloak and kill Martin.


One smarmy James Bond style joke, and your hand'll be needing reconstructive surgery.
Wizard sends Nine, a goon, to go after Shadow Fox.

Mercy keeps searching for Lu's son through the city. Barely escapes and gets poisoned in her arm, that inspires her to give up the case. Shadow Fox wants to know more about the Wizard. Mercy explains how Invisible Woman is practically programmed. The 2 decide to join up.

Goons grab a train station and set 2 trains on the same track to collide. Shadow Fox's husband gets hit by land mine. Nine is wielding a decapitating bird cage. Mercy and Shadow Foxfight against Nine. A train crashes through the station wall and crashes into Nine.

Martin is getting sick from working on the invisibility cloak.

Mercy ties to talk Invisible Woman to joining their side against the Wizard. He finds his wife's orders about stealing the cloak research and death order.

Canyon, Mercy are fighting Invisible Woman. Shadow Fox stops them. They all realize theat they're childhood friends. The 3 head off to rescue Martin.

Nine has Martin and wants the cloak research. The Heroic Trio fight Nine and trap him into some scientific equipment to BBQ him.

The heroines head off to find the missing babies. It's the Wizard and his goons versus Mercy and Shadow Fox until Invisible Woman enters the fray after staying with her dying husband. They manage to blow up the sewers. However, Wizard jumps out out of the explosion in super Kung Fu jump fashion. All that remains of him is his sketal remains that keep fighting before those bones wrap around Invisible Woman like an exo-skeleton. Mercy and Shadow Fox have to contend with Wiz-sketal-IW.

IW jumps off the side of a building to escape Wizard. On the fall, Wizard explodes and breaks off IW. Shadow Fox jumps off to grab the falling IW with Mercy pulling them up. Mercy wants them to look good for the approaching reporters and to decide for a good name for their group: the Heroic Trio.


What I say:

Superheroine fighting movies aren't quite that big unless the videogame movies are included. However, that still isn't enough for even a sub-micro-genre. This movie has you waiting for some fighting be it wire-fu, super-heroine smackdown, not-quite John Wu bullet-fu, or facing the Flying Guillotine birdcage decapitation weapon. Thankfully, the action scenes aren't the same stylized specific fight.

Are you ready for some early 1990s Hong Kong wire fu? If so and want to see women thoroughly Kung Fuin', this is the movie for you. Imagine in a comic book how a couple of super heroes always get "accidentally" dragged into a fight before realizing they're on the same side and team-up against the villain... Well, that's pretty much this movie. Shadow Fox is the heroine in the Batman respect with the police. Mercy is the more almost Deadpool mercenary. The Invisible Woman is the one scarred by her past until escaping working for the wizard to seek the revenge of her husband's death.

An evil Wizard is determined to kidnap enough babies to find one that will become the new immortal of emperor of China. Well, world domination wouldn't be so difficult for any Chineses magical warlords until having to face 3 martial artist superheroines.

One of the hard things about many Hong Kong movies is the number of redubbed versions exist. Most of the movie sets of Kung Fu movies have a fairly lame audio track with the names changing randomly. For instance, Wonder Woman becomes Shadow Fox, the name does get a bit confusing... Trying to keep track of all the characters especially with the flashbacks to their childhood memories.

Point to Ponder
How any movie gets away with naming characters Invisible Woman without Marvel lawyers or Wonder Woman without DC lawyers attacking them would make an interesting movie on its own?


3 NINJAS

Dubbed Quotable Dialogue

"James, don't be akilljoy..."
"It'll be your head next time."
"Well, I guess it's on my team!"
"I know I'm gonna regret this."
"I'm not worried, I'm married to a female superhero."
"Come on out you, old gargoyle!"


Morals of the Story

Vines are commonly used to catch carjackers.
Cats are easily caught with flag poles.
Hedgetrimmers are amputation weapons.
Names are easily changed when hitting one in the back of the head with a log.
Catching birds in mid-air is a skill.


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