Black Cobra (1987)

Cobra Nero

Cast:

Fred "The HAMMER" Williamson is Detective Robert Malone
Eva Grimaldi is Elys Trumbo
Bruno Bilotta is Bandit Leader
Maurice Poli is Chief Max Walker
Vassili Karis is Malone's Partner

What the box says:

Detective Robert Malone (Fred Williamson) is a maverick cop who deals out his own brand of justice in the action backed Black Cobra.

When a photographer witnesses a murder, Malone is assigned to her protection, and with a crazed gang of motorcyclists hot on her trail, Malone is just the man for the job.

Plot:

In New York City, the travel montage begins obviously back in the 1970s.

Nice to know that NYC has such classy plays in Broadway Fred “The Hammer” Williamson is Malone who gets a call of a bank robbery with hostages. He is to negotiate and to agree to the robbers’ demands. However, we know that’s not going to happen since Malone is a cop who plays by his own rules. Malone quickly manages to gun the goons down. The Captain chews Malone out.

Everybody, ready for our Steppinwolf moment...
Get your motor runnin', head out on the highway Elsewhere, a biker gang is driving around and spots a couple frolicking at the beach. The gang goes for the couple’s camper and finds the wife. Driving around on the beach, they shoot the husband.

Elys Trumbo, fashion model, has to return to a photo shoot. Her ex-boyfriend, Alex, is 2 steps away from a restraining order.

TOO DARK TO SEE scene ensues. The gang attacks someone and Elys manages to get some pics of them and escapes.

Malone gets a call to go back to the station. The captain tells him how the model saw and photographed the murderer. The pics didn’t turn out good. The captain has Malone guard her.

Crazy gang shenanigans ensue. They rant about the wealthy and want to eliminate the model. They learn she’s at the hospital.

In another TOO DARK TO SEE scene, they’re at the hospital. They drag in one of them that was “hurt”. Malone is driving to the hospital. The gang has started to search to find the model. Malone finds an unconscious nurse. The gang kills the police guard before Malone catches up to them. Let the gunfight ensue. The distraught model is saved by Malone at the last second.

The other officers aren’t happy with Malone’s methods. He is sure the only way to protect Elys is for her to stay at his place.

Another TOO DARK TO SEE scene, the gang wants Malone and the model dead. They decide to stake out her house.

Malone gets some mug shot books for Elys to look through. He wants to try to trap the killer. Later, he takes Elys back to her place to get some clothes. A gang member lurks nearby and opens fire. However, he’s nowhere the shot of Malone.

The gang is really ready to strike. They take Max’s daughter hostage and demand that Max get the photos and get Malone to the abandoned power station.

Max tells Malone what’s happened. As Malone gets ready, Max tells Elys how Malone’s parents died and was raised by a store owner that was killed by some robbers. The incident changed Malone.

At the power station, the gang is surprised when a car pulls up and Malone springs out of the trunk with a machine gun and mows down several of the gang members. Let the climactic gunfight ensue. The last surviving gang member has the officer’s daughter as a human shield. Malone lets loose with his “Dirty Harry” speech that scares the guy to surrender.

Later, Elys thanks Malone for his help. Somehow, a gang member got away and cleans up in a suit to finish Elys once and for all.

Elys and Malone are out at dinner. Malone’s spider sense is tingling but the guy escapes. Malone is in a non-Roscoe P. Coltrane hot pursuit of the guy. After crashing his car, Malone finds the guy on the ground. Walking away, the guy jumps Malone. Fighting, Malone finishes him.

As the rest of the police clean things up, Max is glad to learn Malone is taking a vacation to visit where he grew up.

What I say:

I've mentioned how many genres have been inspired by the success of one single movie. Mad Max led to Italy creating the post-apocalyptic genre. Conan the Barbarian led to the Italian barbarian sub-genre. By the mid-1980s, the Italian-sploitation genres had worn out of most of their steam or just wasn't able to survive how movies like Sword and the Sorcerer and Warriors of the Wasteland were aired on the movie channels or readily available at the local video stores.

Most of the Italian genres inspired by movies like the aforementioned Mad Max or Conan the Barbarian were good movies. However, I never thought that Sylvester Stallone's Cobra has never been accused as a groundbreaking police movie. It is still hard to believe that Cobra led to Italian filmmakers thinking Cobra-sploitation would be a good idea. Well in the 1980s, "homages" is translated into French for "rip-offs."

The quality of the Star Wars Holiday Special is better than this copy of Black Cobra. Normally, I don't mention the quality of a movie on a DVD. However, it looks like a 4 or 5 generation dub. With as washed-out, the first scenes that show the travelogue of New York City were so old, I had a very hard time believing the movie was made in 1987. I almost expected to hear the intro for Shaft or from Fred "The Hammer" Williamson's Black Caesar or Hell Comes to Harlem.

Cobra had Stallone versus a crazy cult trying to kill a model who was a witnessed a murder. Black Cobra has Fred Williamson protecting a model who witnessed a street gang murder a guy. Some of the 1970s cop movies got homaged (or according to the French "Le'ripppped offffffffff...) Fred graduated from the Dirty Harry Police Academy. He even does a "Do you feel lucky, punk" speech. In fact, if the lines were any closer, Clint Eastwood would have telported into the movie and sang the songs from "Paint Your Wagon" to torture them for insult.

The later into the movie, the more I realized how dubbed it was into English. I'm sure the Italian verion had Fred dubbed into Italian. However, seeing the model talk near the end, she looked like someone trying to do an impression of someone in a Godzilla movie. It's a shame that we didn't have Chris Latta screaming "Hail Cobra!!!" The late Mr. Latta was the voice of Cobra Commander from the 1980s GI Joe cartoon.

The worst thing I've found in movies is "TOO DARK TO SEE" scenes. It is hard to believe I found a movie with this many "TOO DARK TO SEE" scenes.

Quotable Dialogue
"They're scum, human garbage."
"This is something else Purvis, Red label."
"Lady, lady gimme a break with all the noise."
"Milk is more my thing."
Morals of the Story
Banks look like empty warehouses.
Banks hae swimming pools.
Empty cat food cans should be left in kitchen cabinets.
Nurses wear studded leather jackets.
Teenagers love to listen to Ah-Ha.
Fashion models aren't bothered by gunfire.