Side Order of Ninjas

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Welcome to Side Order of Ninjas, the only source of 175% of the daily required ninjalisciousness, Power of Sonny Chiba compels you to my site. As Criswell has said "The guilty must be punished and the innocent must be rewarded." We're going to try to leave the more commonly reviewed movies alone for some that have escaped (fortunately or unfortunately) the viewing public... I'll have a new review up each Wednesday provided flood, famine, or family don't strike. This site was established as of February 23, 2003... And Hardcore Legend of Ninjaball says the site is a bit spiffier, too...if I do say so myself...

News for 4-23-2014

I really appreciate those that have inadvertently stumbled across my site. Of course, I have to thank the truly ninjaliscious Ten of Fans who has wasted at least 5 minutes of their life on reading my reviews. After, you've sated your ninjalicious self here, be sure to check out the April edition of Rogue Cinema.

Since this is labor of ninjalisciousness, I appreciate any comments that decrease its craptacularity and anything that proclaims my greatness. It's always good to hear from any of my Ten of fans. If you wish to shower the Hardcore Legend of Ninjaball (an inside joke that possibly 3 people in the world may get) with accolades and perhaps screener DVDs. Who am I to disagree? Note, I have never been socially relevant and don't intend to start now.

The past few months, I've been close to falling off the grid as any ranting B-movie reviewer can be and still be online. I actually am trying to bet back into the groove... Yes, hopefully, the forces of darkness are no longer against me any more. See the dangers of a 1970s Afterschool Special but theatrically in the 1930s with all the joy of a Greek tragedy film in Road to Ruin. For the 90 minutes of a Jayne Mansfield movie so little of it really applies to her or let alone the title: Single Room Furnished.

Road to Ruin

Single Room Furnished
Children of the Corn V: Field of Terror

Ever see Cthulhu and Sauron at the same place at the same time?
Any movie requests, comments, Scarlett Johansson or Natassia Malthe send email to
31 butter knives I've stuck in my mouth...that I've counted at least
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